Metroid Database.com

Oh god.

According to this article on Planet Gamecube and long-running entertainment news report Variety.com (subscription necessary to view Variety article), Hollywood's Zide/Perry Entertainment (producers of Final Destination, American Pie) have acquired movie rights to Metroid. Few details are available and little to no crew or cast appears to have been decided or announced.

Judging by Hollywood's track record of making terrible movies based on videogames, many fans are already squirming in their seats. Others are skeptical that the project will even see the light of day at all. I suppose we'll just have to wait and see on both counts. Hey, ya never know.

I just have one more thing to say: if they do make it, I want a cameo appearance in it. I'll be a scientist that gets killed by Ridley, or a Galactic Federation officer, or Samus' friggin' mechanic that tunes up her ship -- anything. Hey Hollywood, contact me!

--TJ